Episode 7

It was the same flight of stairs to home but they seemed to have increased in number .It took like ages before I stood in front of the white door adorned with ‘Chatterjee’s ‘ written in bronze .I lifted my hand to the door bell. I was startled out of breath at the way the door flung open before I could ring the bell .My aunt stood there looking tired .Mom and she would probably be back from another of their pre marriage shopping spree ,I concluded .I forced on a smile and said ” hello”.

As I entered I saw mom sitting on the sofa, with shopping bags in all shapes, size and colour, flocked around her .There I had guessed right , another dip in the bank balance .Only if I had told her last night , we could have avoided this unnecessary damage. The banker in me could not overlook the financial loss that this whole episode would bring around .Caterers ,party venue managers, decorators had all left our home with part of their bills as advance, weeks ago. Anyway , coming back to mom .I went and plopped myself next to her .She looked exhausted .So exhausted ,that she did not even bother asking me why I was home so early .I let the thought pass me peacefully as I started a conversation .”Mom, shopping again  ! I’ll have to get extra storage build to keep all of those.” What I   heard next was like the atom bomb on Hiroshima Nagasaki causing mass destruction to all my plans and imagination .Aunt sat quietly with a morbid expression all over her face ,as mom said in a frail voice ,”You should have told me Megha .” I heard from a distance, aunts voice, explaining that they had received a call from Pranav’s parents ,the minute they entered the house after attending to the neverending shopping list (which is a part of all Indian marriages).

I sat there sharing the same space of agony as my mom. I moved a little closer to her ,to which she said ,”What shall we do now?” she turned to face me, as she said ,”months back I did not know where to start with all the preparation for your marriage ,time was short and today I don’t know how to undo all the preparation or retrace my steps back to a normal life.” With this she crumbled in front of me and broke down. Aunt came and filled the other side of the sofa next to her sister .She put her arms around mom  ,while I sat there,lonely,with a steady flow of tears trinkling down my cheeks and leaving a wet patch on my kurta . We were all paying the price for the mischievous act of destiny in our lives. The evening passed with no significant dialogues between mother-daughter . Aunt had politely left us to be together and fight our battle in silence.

The next morning I woke up with a heavy feeling in the head .For the first time I looked forward to being in office . I could hide in my cubicle, my space and bury myself in work  forgetting the stress created in my personal life . But blinding or burying myself from real life issues , like the proverbial giraffe,  was not going to help either. So the next few days were filled in with family meetings and subsequently calling the marriage facilitators cancelling everything .Calls had to be made to relatives who would have received the formal invites by now, at alarming postal speed. I for once could not enjoy being  proud of the progress in the Indian postal system.  It was a painful process but we had to go through it nevertheless!

Now this is the juncture, at which I was reassured about how proud I was to be an Indian and the fact that I was fortunate to be amongst them too !! As  I met the event facilitators, like I would call them ,I was amazed and touched at their unprofessional attitude , at the sudden cancellation of their orders .Instead of claiming damage ,they stood consoling me and promising me that they would pay back all the money they had taken as advance ! Now where else but in India do you get to see and feel this fraternity  . The whole world had seemingly joined hands to stand by me and support me in these difficult times .The next few days were a flurry of activities between work and home .But gradually things were falling into place and I was coming to terms with the situation.

Pranav was still in Delhi  ,he had been advised dialysis, which is as I later learned, a medical support  for purifying blood. Neither had I heard from Rajeev or Pranav’s parents nor could I gather the strength to call them  .What would I say to them? So I was quite independent of all thoughts regarding him. It was as if I had spoken too soon. As I prepared myself  for office one morning ,ten days away from the 21^st of  November, the ill-fated day ! I was stopped by the landline phone ringing  ,I rushed to the phone imagining it to be Aunt . I spoke in ,”Hello “ the silence from the other end made my heart thud hard and I once again said more firmly “Hello?”.After a brief  pause what I heard felt like torture to my eardrums .It was Pranav and he was crying. A strong man older to me by 4 years ,crying. I was absolutely numb and I did not know what to say.I could feel my eyes stinging with tears while my voice felt choked . Finally ,I heard myself saying ,”How are you ,Pranav?” the reply came almost inaudibly ,”I am fine Megha , how are you?”

Before I could frame a reply I heard Pranav saying ,”I am sorry Megha, I messed it all up for you .You did not deserve all of this .” The words were pain inflicting but I gathered them and strung them together meaningfully, saying ,”Neither of us are capable of fighting back our destiny. So you do not need to be sorry .It was our destiny”. The words seemed quoted, out of all that I had been told by various well-wishers for the last few days. We finished the conversation rather abruptly ,probably because neither of us wished to prolong this’ comforting each other ‘ act . We were both caught in a storm and  had to find our safe way out, towards home .The storm had separated us ,we were not meant to be together so we had to move on in our own lives ,fighting separate battles.But never for once could I fight back the concerns about how he and his family were confronting this nightmare!!